Showing rather than telling: the exercise
Expand three of the following statements in a way that replaces abstractions and generalities with concrete
(sensory), specific, significant details. Notice that well-chosen specifics can act as representatives of all the rest,
and do so more effectively than trying to talk about everything as a whole. The expansions need be only long
enough to show that you understand the distinction between showing and telling. And you need do only three.
Here are the statements:
1.The furniture in the room was old.
2.The party was awful.
3.The traffic was heavy.
4.Loud sounds, inviting smells, and warm smiles are present during a football game.
5.Even schools are becoming more violent.
6.There was construction all over on that road.
7.We all remember happy times as a child, running, jumping, playing, and generally having fun.
8.Downtown comes alive at night.
9.I was not in the mood to wait in line for customs. The line was outrageous and it would be at
least 45 minutes before we got through.